Sunday, May 25, 2008

Kids' useful instructions on life

"Wear a hat when feeding seagulls."
- Rocky, age 9

"Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning."
- Stephanie, age 8

"Don't flush the john when your dad's in the shower."
- Lamar, age 10

"Never ask for anything that costs more than $5 when your parents are doing taxes."
- Carrol, age 9

"Never bug a pregnant mom."
- Nicholas, age 11

"Don't ever be too full for dessert."
- Kelly, age 10

"When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' don't answer him."
- Heather, age 16

"Never tell your mom her diet's not working."
- Michael, age 14

"Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat."
- Joel, age 12

"When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone."
- Alyesha, age 13

"Never try to baptize a cat."
- Laura, age 13

"Never spit when on a roller coaster."
- Scott, age 11

"Never do pranks at a police station."
- Sam, age 10

"Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving."
- Rob, age 10

"Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do."
- Hank, age 12

"Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand."
- Molly, age 11

"Listen to your brain. It has lots of information."
- Chelsey, age 7

"Stay away from prunes."
- Randy, age 9

"Never dare your little brother to paint the family car."
- Phillip, age 13

"Forget the cake, go for the icing."
- Cynthia, age 8

"Remember the two places you are always welcome - church and Grandma's house."
- Joanne, age 11

"When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents."
- Matthew, age 12

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